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when my thoughts collapse,

there are vowels where there should be none

Tegan's Fave
i am progressive and aggressive.

Because woman's work is never done and is underpaid or unpaid or boring or repetitious and we're the first to get fired and what we look like is more important than what we do and if we get raped it's our fault and if we get beaten we must have provoked it and if we raise our voices we're nagging bitches and if we enjoy sex we're nymphos and if we don't we're frigid and if we love women it's because we can't get a "real" man and if we ask our doctor too many questions we're neurotic and/or pushy and if we expect childcare we're selfish and if we stand up for our rights we're aggressive and "unfeminine" and if we don't we're typical weak females and if we want to get married we're out to trap a man and if we don't we're unnatural and because we still can't get an adequate safe contraceptive but men can walk on the moon and if we can't cope or don't want a pregnancy we're made to feel guilty about abortion and... for lots and lots of other reasons we are part of the women's liberation movement.

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i like to blow spit bubbles, but i don't know how to blow chewing gum bubbles. i make damned tasty air popped popcorn. my roommate takes the longest, steamiest showers ever and i like to pretend i am in a sauna when he gets out. i make up songs about my surroundings. i like sun naps and sun stretches, in that order. i like to rub my fingertips against rubber bands and then smell them. seeing squirrels makes me happy. i used to be in spelling bees growing up. my armpit hair is impressive. i like challenging words and the heft of them on my tongue. as much as i love music, it's not much good to me in the mornings. i am a triplet. i like to make faces at my computer screen to pass the time at work. i survive on paninis i make on my george foreman lean mean grilling machine. i hate medicine. i read poetry and political essays out loud with my friends. i think we should bring back story time. i want to go back to school for my master's in library sciences. i like boyshorts on ladies. it takes a lot of initative for me to cut my toenails. i am a tetris master. i have an unhealthy obsession with eBay. i recently bought a fondue pot and have been delighting myself with recipes. i am a voracious reader. my eyes always water when i take that first drink of soda. my friends have nailed down accurate imitations of me. i recently discovered the joy that is asparagus. i have two tattoos, with a third in the process. my left eardrum is perforated because i couldn't afford health insurance to check out an illness. i hate double negatives. i am ambitious. i burn incense every chance i get, especially nag champa and sandalwood. i miss seattle. i live in flip flops, but i prefer being barefoot. i like to twirl in skirts. underwear is optional. i am a grammar nazi. i hate comic sans, but could talk your ear off about other fonts. oversized food costumes crack me up. i love coffee ice cream. i like to make goals for my friends. i am trying to learn how to cook. i cry easily at television dramas. i am an embarrassingly lightweight drunk. i love wasabi mayonnaise, extra hot yellow curry, and salty kale. i will punish you if you misbehave, and try to make you misbehave as often as i can. i am undauntingly inspiring.
adbusters, allen ginsberg, america™, amy hempel, androgyny, angelina jolie, ani difranco, bare feet, beer, bloc party, blowing out candles, books, boyshorts, brazen pairings of patterns, breaking down the gender-binary, brenda weiler, bright eyes, british accents, buy nothing day, caps on napa trucks, cat power, cell phone text predictors, chick flicks, coheed and cambria, cold stone creamery, coldplay, couches, creativity, cruiser bikes, daniel johnston, davis?, deconstructing gender, different terms for vagina, drag kings, dvds, dykes, eating slowly, ebay, egon schiele, el guapo sandwiches, elephant, ember swift, emily haines, feminism, flip flops, foreign films, gauged ears, gay movies, george foreman grills, get your war on, gina gershon, good magazine, heels clicking on tile, homestar runner, if it was you, independent labels, individuality, ingrid michaelson, inside jokes, intellectual attraction, intentional punctuation, jim carrey, julia fullerton-batten, kraft macaroni and cheese, kurt halsey, lesbians, living juicy, looking at q-tip boxes, lyndell montgomery, martin sexton, mashed potatoes, menstruation, metric, minimalism, modest mouse, moonlit strolls, morphine, ms. magazine, muffin but trouble, noam chomsky, old shirts, one market under god, opening cans of soda, packages from strangers, peaches, picture frames, pictures, piercings, polaroid cameras, procrastinating at work, progressives, purposeful activism, queers, rachael cantu, rachel maddow, reading naked, reese's peanut butter cups, regina spektor, rilo kiley, road trips, rubber cement, sandalwood incense, sark, saul williams, sex dreams, sigur ros, silly terms of endearment, simplicity, singing wildly offkey, sleeping in, squirrels, succulent wild women, sun naps, sun stretches, sundance films, sylvia plath, tegan and sara, tegan quin’s sweet hoots, tetris, the bell jar, the concept of love, the cranberries, the postal service, the roots, the smell of sharpies, thinking about sewing, ties on girls, toothpastefordinner.com, tree tattoos, triplets, vagina monologues, walking home drunk, wicca, wilco, wild cherry pepsi, women, women's hockey, women's studies, writing, yellow legal pads